The Things I Never Asked

A printable digital book.
Three PDFs. Downloaded instantly. Printed at home.

Nothing ships. Nothing arrives in the mail.

There is a version of your grandparent you have never met.

The one who was nineteen and terrified.

The one who almost married someone else.

The one who got through the year nobody in the family talks about.

They will not offer that person up on their own. Nobody does.

They have to be asked — and most of us never get around to it until it isn't possible anymore.

What you get

1. The Book
42 pages. 120 questions in nine sections.

The easy ones come first. The ones that matter most come last, once the room has warmed up. It starts with the house they grew up in. It ends with what they want you to know.

Answer sheets at the back — print as many as you need.

2. How to Have This Conversation
5 pages.

The hard part was never finding the questions. It's starting. How to bring it up without it feeling strange, where to sit, what to do when they cry, what to do when they shut down.

3. How to Record Their Voice
5 pages.

Photographs, you have thousands of. A recording of them simply talking, almost nobody has. How to capture it on the phone in your pocket — and how not to lose it.

How it works

• Buy it. Download link by email in seconds.
• Print it. US Letter, any home printer. Looks right in black and white.
• Ask them. Take it to the kitchen table.

Good to know

• Digital download. Not a physical book.
• Works for a grandmother or a grandfather.
• Yours forever. No subscription, no app, no account.
• Print it as many times as you like.

A few things worth saying

You don't have to finish it. Four questions on a Sunday afternoon is a good Sunday afternoon.

You don't need a reason to start. But if they ask for one: tell them you want to get it down while you still can.

And you don't need to do it perfectly. The only real mistake is the one almost everybody makes, which is waiting.